Please view this image zoomed in
Taken with the actual medication I will be using. and the tree is real.
I know I rarely do still life... but this is an exception for this piece is very personal to me.
As many of my followers know, I battle clinical depression as well as server anxiety. I have been doing this battle since I was 14 years old and I have been on and off all types of medication.... Depression ruined a lot for me.
To make stories short, a couple years ago, I was on antidepressiants but was forced to go off them due to financial difficulties. After I went off my meds at that time, (since I ran out of money) I battled server withdrawal that nearly killed me (as in took a lot out of me to the point life was not worth living anymore).
After that, I was unmedication for a long time and it was awful. My life was draining from me, my motivation for photography was slowly disappearing I was angry, mean, hateful, irritated and wanting nothing out of life. I actually came to a conclusion in my head that it is okay to hate life and dreams are stupid because they do not come true. I hated everything, and even the smallest tasks like doing dishes or making the bed frustrated me. I had no motivation to do anything... not even photography or trying to become something in life because i was just so depressed and just so mentally tired.
After a few mental break downs and anxiety attacks, I had no more strength to push on and I stopped being stubborn and decided to get some serious help. My depression was starting to harm me psychically, back pains, heart pains, chest pains....
So a couple days ago, I went to the hospital (very anxious) and spoke to a few doctors and therapists. Did some tests and xrays, the usual. And then the doctor gave me some medications that he said matched my condition and would help me greatly. And has it? Yes it has. And today I can feel that I am stronger now and balance. I feel I can finally get my life back on track... I even managed to get some cleaning done that I could never motivate myself to get done before. I finally found the right medication for me....
So here the the antidote. This medication will help me grow strong like a tree and wise like a tree. You need patience to find the right medication, get help and grow strong like tree.